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THIS BEAUTIFUL BOY

by Short Shorts

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1.
OH MY GOD 05:58
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Oh Here we are again and I am not your friend I keep hurting you, and though you know it’s true You love me, too No Name Woman help me Abuser of affection, it has all gone too far Now all I want won’t leave me alone It’s not fun anymore Oh my god I was sure you died, but, damn, you’re still here This is all my fault I’m sure that it doesn’t help that I live in the night that I was shaking in your arms Face to face with everything I know is lost Came to terms with it Now I’m so in love with nothing at all OH MY GOD DID I HURT YOU, TOO? IT’S A SELFISH LOVE THAT TELLS ME TO SING TO YOU I don’t wanna hear it, why would I ever ever wanna be like you Oh my god, do you get drunk before I even talk to you? You’re gonna have to grow up, sell all your albums, they just take up space Kill your heroes, they can’t feed you when you’re in your brand new place I didn’t know before But now I am sure I am so fucking glad I came to you to talk about this Don’t give me what I want Don’t give me what I deserve I don’t wanna die To say I am Is to say I am haunted But how did I get so discouraged?
2.
Beautiful Boy 03:50
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He don’t know that you love him and he won’t Any outstretched hand turns to one that chokes He’s choking He’d ask you to “Please leave me alone” and you’d say: “What’s a Beautiful Boy who don’t feel that way?” Did you know he asks himself every day? The shame is so heavy He’s really really sorry The boy is me and I’m sorry for lying I don’t want to live or die I just want you to take my eyes and save me from my atrocities Can you tell? This Beautiful Boy won’t be around for long So send him all your favorite songs Last night you said that you loved me And that really fucked with me I wish that I could sing I wish that I could sing better I wish I could stand myself I wish I could stand myself better I wish that I was not I wish that I was not breaking I wish that I could stay I wish that I could stay happy Hey baby When you try to help me It feels so good It hurts so good It’s so complicated Abused, misused, and frustrated Beautiful Boy You’re so far gone Beautiful Boy You can still come home
3.
Nico 04:43
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Nico what a nice surprise  I just texted you, what are the odds?  I have been alone all day  I don't know why I feel this way  I'm always sad  It's so embarrassing  Nothing's wrong  But also everything  Nico, please  Do not go misconstrue  The problem will never be you  The usual bits won't make me laugh today  But if you wait, yeah, if you wait  Tomorrow we'll do all the things you wanna do  I wanna do 'em all  I wanna do 'em with you  Oh my god  Am I that friend?  High maintenance and makes it all about him?  Oh my god  Am I that friend?  Tippy-toe on glass whenever we're around him.  Nico I have lost the war  Burn my body and make it a star  That way I can watch you guys  I'll laugh when you laugh and cry when you cry  Don't be scared  Nico don't say goodbye  I'll stick around  At least until I die  Yeah, I'm still fun  On every other day  I bet this time it'll stay  The usual bits hit all the right notes today  It feels good to laugh  Oh, what a beautiful day!  Today we'll get real high and play video games  Nico if I change  You and I will stay the same  (Can't you see it's a metaphor for all of you?)
4.
Can't Remember 04:11
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I’m afraid that something is wrong with me Still I sing “la la la la la la” I make you cry like we’re in the final scene Still I sing “la la la la la la” Why don’t you feel like me? Can’t you see it crumbling? It’s all so nothing at all And I am ready for the fall I can’t remember I can’t recall All of the numbers They asked me to call But if you leave yours by the door I’ll take the steps you’re asking for Yeah, I’ll try I shudder at the thought of them making art I mean, have they ever held a stance? Yeah you stress me out You always find a way to blame Courtney Love No I kid But I really don’t Why do they always point their fingers at my throat? Now I’m paranoid and I’m too scared to ask you to stay Big Blue Tell me the deeds that I need to do To live the life that helps me be hopeful Love the arms that held me closer When all I wanted was to curl up and die They say that I’m not tryin’ Well I think they’re lyin’ I mean, I wrote this song
5.
Newman Day 02:41
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I got so drunk that I try to make my girlfriend cry I got so drunk that I tried to get a DUI I got so drunk that this time I don’t wanna die Waiting for that rice to cook Looking at the blunt, I want more of it Make it horny or I won’t remember you Or be smart, that’ll get me horny, too I don’t wanna be so drunk that I piss on the floor I don’t wanna be so drunk I forget what it’s for I’ve never been alone before this moment I been through this a thousand times, but I still don’t know what to feel I knew you like the back of my hand I can’t find my way anymore I wish it hadn’t gone like this I wouldn’t feel so sick I want no more of it And now this is finally done Here comes the fucking sun
6.
As You Like It 05:00
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May air fresh in the morning Blowing through my open window Your love as clear as day and Baby I like it, baby I like it that way Your hair warm between my fingers Your legs outrunning all suspicion Our pictures are already fading but Baby I like it, baby I like it that way There are things that the heart can’t take There are things that even lovers fake Of course I’m afraid of your love It’s never good when I come on this strong So how do I deserve all this affection? And how do deserve all this devotion? And we’re in love So I don’t care What your brother said To me back there Shakespeare is dead Oh what a drag As you like it One year, never kept me hanging I think I’m ready to give you my mind One shot is all it would take and Baby I like it, baby I like it that way In bed you always let me sleep in In bed I’m gracefully unaware How you turn the night to day but Baby I like it, baby I like it that way There are things that the heart will take There are things we suffer for a lover’s sake Rosalind swears that we’re a perfect pair I’m inclined to believe in her I think that she’s actually God/Cause I’m in love
7.
River 01:21
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You take off all your clothes now They take off all their clothes Shirts, skirts, and underwear Get dressed, get out of bed You were smart You brought the only umbrella Only in blue And just in the smaller sizes It could have happened It had to happen Oh, it happened But not to you You were in luck There was a forest You were in luck There were no trees
8.
Ghost of Love 03:14
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The ghost of love The ghost of love It’s the line you wish you wrote It’s the words caught in your throat The ghost of love The ghost of love It arrives when they are gone It’s only there when you’re alone Can you see the moon where you are? The ghost of love The ghost of love Trace your fingers across its skin It always ends/it always begins So wave goodbye You’re almost here To take your place To steal your grave I cross my heart And then I hope to die Why do I do this shit? Why do I think I like it? I should go out on a nice long walk and cherish who is near And then I’ll cry because our love is now a fear
9.
No Sun 01:55
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When you just can’t see the sun And all your hope is dead and gone Try to look inside yourself For the yellow on the shelf Yellow varnish on my nails For the dead men who tell no tales The real sun does not compare To the varnish on my nails Sun on my fingernails Everybody gather round On my nails are heavens bound In my arms this solar power Touch me now, this is the hour
10.
Y.A.A.O.C 01:40
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It can be anything It can be something We will protect you Yeah we will go there I love you so bad Go to the freezer Take out the ice cream Tastes like my people Hey chalamet You act Shakespeare, that’s nice Love is real Yeah, I checked it, yeah I saw it If you just see me as a problem I can get up and go You freak me out with all your thinking When push comes to shove
11.
Feeling Cute, Might Delete Myself Later 03:20
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If I am cute can you tell me? I hate myself so it’s hard for me to know These clothes are dirty, need changing It aint a fit if you feel like shit I just want your constant feedback Rip me open and stuff a problem in me Don’t feel so cute, wouldn’t want to delete yourself Self-hatred is so exhausting Sometimes I wish that I was just an idiot With no thoughts there’s no problems in and out, obsession how it would flow
12.
Say Her Name 04:37
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Say her name, motherfucker, say her name Choke on all the blood and dust kicked up by your ignorance I’d never wish depression on anyone but you’re a pretty good exception Making life much worse for them, you should know you’re no one’s friend There’s no politics for love There’s no politics for respect We rob ourselves of each other just to tell someone off We’re not pulling you out, we’re pulling others back in It’s a long, dark road for men like you You don’t wanna be seen like that? Well maybe don’t act like that Hey now Let’s get penile Gay panic You can see it in their eyes They’re afraid now Cause they see how How a beauty never goes away So they’re grasping So they’re gasping Under the weight of phantasms, oh, who remind them Of their sins when They lock up little kids and act like it’s nothing Hey Do you think you can stay just one more day? If it doesn’t work out, then go away, far away Oh Do you think we can change? Cause I’d really like to Oh Do you think we can change? Cause I really like you
13.
Damn Shame 02:56
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You said you never asked to be the one Summer’s over Now it’s time to move on One whole year since I turned 21 Two whole years since I told anyone that Three years ago I fell and didn’t get up Waited 4 more years to sing this song, so Baby don’t you love me? Don’t you know I care? I don’t want nobody Telling me it’s fair Questions come from answers You’ve been snooping round Burning all the bridges before you burn the town (When you tell me that you love me) I’ll resent you again (When you tell me that you hate me) I’m in the palm of your hand Isn’t that just a shame? It’s just one of those damn things.
14.
The Ballad of Elliot Alone 05:52
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I am so alone All of my friends in my headphones My art fails (or so I fret) To capture the magic I feel when I hear myself in the song In the record store, I could not find any luck (in my heart I knew I was asking too much) Help is something I never really ask for (I think you’re dumb if you ever wanna know more) Besides, I waste it every time. Oh my god, point me at the face of love Show me its greatest kindness How it searches even though I only asked once For a moment, I wonder if I really want this Then she’s back with the record in her hands A great album, I’m your biggest fan A real desire to infiltrate the artist’s lungs Don’t choke on my ambition Looking down from the podium miles above you Coming down fast but don’t let me break you Elliot Alone is a force of nature The albums were good but the concerts were better I wanna be a rock star so bad. Send me pictures of the body. So when the night comes And you’re crying to your favorite song That’ll be me I’m Elliot Alone You’re never alone I kiss my girl She holds my hand I sing my songs She likes my band Heaven is a place on earth where only I decide my worth I’m so alone with or without you So please Tell me, if you can Do you feel less alone?
15.
My Great Big Feeling 03:13
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He was my great big feeling She was my great big feeling They were my great big feeling Now I’m my own great big feeling I thought I saw you walking around But it was only your doppelgänger I told them that they aren’t who they are And they said, “Hey, it takes one to know one” This was a time that I thought that love would Come from way out there Now I find that If love’s gonna find me I’ll have to make it myself I’ll be my great big feeling to feel

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released May 3, 2019

THIS BEAUTIFUL BOY is Ted Burns
Cover by Abby Myers

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Short Shorts Portland, Maine

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